September 2009
8 posts
Clearly
i hate when i get in my dumb moods. i make myself sound so emo, it’s bad. i am happy, more than happy. schools just annoying & it stresses me out way too much, i start sing wednesday though!
IM TOO EXCITED FOR MY OWN GOOD.
Awesome
i feel like i’m going back to last year again. i don’t like it. i need to snap out of it now. fuck school for stressing me out, fuck my teacher for making me take a 3 hour class that i don’t need, just fuuuuuck everything.
wheres summer? i miss it. & i miss being happy. i guess nothing really ever last.
I remember what happiness felt like..
it was finding myself after i lost you. it was seeing that i was alright on my own. happiness was realizing you weren’t who i thought you were, but finally accepting it and being okay with it. it was having faith in a lesson learned. it was realizing that the hurt might not go away, but you get stronger and the pain lessens. or, maybe it doesn’t even lessen. maybe i’ve just...
2010!
today was my last first day of school, can i just say how insane that feels? i remember first walking into school and the first thing i said was ‘i can’t wait to get out of here.’ and now, it’s finally happening and I’m so releaved. i like all my classes, i guess. except the fact that they gave me a lunch period, now I’m stuck monitoring since i will know...
summers over
its funny how one summer can change everything. it must be something about the heat, and the smell of chlorine, fresh cut grass and honeysuckle, asphalt sizzling after late-day thunderstorms, the steam rising while everything drips around it. something about long, lazy days and whirring air conditioners and bright plastic flip flops from the drug store. something about fall being so close, another...
Dreamer
Privacy is the world of things you know about yourself and don’t need to share. It’s your relationship with yourself. The way you cry at sad movies and sing in front of the mirror. The way you believe you’ll be a movie star or win a Nobel Prize. Whatever it is. Those dreams you’re entitled to. The difference is that you’re not ashamed. Your private thoughts empower...
"Things change and friends leave and life doesn't...
I hate how people enter our lives, make us feel better about ourselves and then leave. I used to think that was okay as long as they’ve inspired me with their unspoken wisdom. But now? I’m starting to wish to never have met any of those people. At least then I wouldn’t have to be grieving over their departure. I don’t know how many more times I can manage doing this. It...
I just think happiness is what makes people...
The mind may have forgotten, but the body remembers everything -in the melody of a song, in a rip of a dress, in a taste stuck at the tip of your tongue, in the freckled constellation splattered across your light skin, in a look not mean to be a look, in the movement their hips against yours, in a graze between nervous hands, in the loud beat of your beating heart. In one moment, the body...
August 2009
9 posts
Quiet
So I’ve been pondering quite deeply about my future lately and it scares me endless. I can’t stop myself from envying those who have a dream that they’re chasing after. I’m so jealous of how clear their paths ahead seem to be, how they seem to know exactly what to do to achieve their dreams, being so confident and sure of their future. While I stand here, completely lost and bewildered, not quite...
My First, Your First.
You never forget your first best friend, or your first crush. You never forget your first favorite teacher, or your first elementary school. You never forget your first concert you went to, or maybe even the first cd you bought. You never forget where you came from, or the recipe to your favorite home-made meal and your first vacation. You never forget your first pet, and all the lonliness you...
Sunshine
I get to see my best friend tomorrow. I think that pretty much covers it right now.
K BYE.
Fight for what you want.
“If you wake up in a different time in a different place, could you wake up as a different person?” It’s funny how the world is always there to remind you of who you were. It makes it that much harder to progress through life, to become the perpetual number of things one could become. Someone once said to me, “Sadness is easy because it’s surrender. You have to work...
The World Stops
when i see you, the world stops. it stops and all that exists for me is you and my eyes staring at you. there’s nothing else. no noise, no other people, no thoughts or worries, no yesterday, no tommorow. the world just stops and its a beautiful place and there’s only you.. just you, and my eyes staring at you. when you’re gone, the world starts again and i don’t like it as...
Whether it's the best of times or the worst of...
“a medical textbook will tell you that the human body is powered by our blood, full of oxygen; and by our cells, and our brain when something is wrong with you a doctor will fill our ears with medical language where “laymans terms” include things like “acute” and “severe” and we’ll do what we can. sometimes they use “i’m sorry for your...
my wonderful venting session...
one day i’m not going to do what i’m expected to do. one day i’m going to do what makes me happy. one day soon i’m going to live my life.
one thing that i absolutely hate about growing up is change. i hate having to re-gain a whole new group of friends, and i hate feeling lonely.
i guess it’s just hard to lose friendships. i find myself questioning myself, time and...
i wish i could be yours..
I want to wake up everyday not dreading anything, or worrying about anything. Just being happy that it’s a new day. I want to go to the ocean, and lay on the sand, just listening to the crash of the waves against the shore. i want to swim with dolphins, I want to get a love letter. a cute cute love letter. I want to get a tan, without having to pay money to use a tanning bed. I want to have...
Sunsets
why do we find the sunset (and sunrise for that matter), so beautiful? it’s something we see everyday and every night. why do we find it just as beautiful every time like we’ve never seen it before? it’s nothing unusual. it’s always the same for the most part. so why is it so captivating? yes, the colors are astonishing and it’s beautiful to look at, but...